Dumb Blonde: 57: Dumb Blonde: Bailee's Mom

57: Dumb Blonde: Bailee's Mom

Jun 24, 2020

Bunnie and Felicia, Bailee’s mom, talk about her journey overcoming addiction and coming back into her daughter’s life. Bailee talks about what it’s like to have her mom back in her life and how they have combatted her addiction as a family.

Watch Full Episodes & More:
www.dumbblondeunrated.com

Takeaways:

Jelly and Felicia first hooked up when she was 16
Felicia got pregnant with Bailee in August or September of 2007, Bailee was born May 22, 2008
Jelly was very invested in jump starting his career and wasn’t always present in their relationship; their relationship was very turbulent.
Jelly got arrested and was gone for a year in 2008, Bailee was born just after he left.
- When he got out of jail and wanted to see Bailee, Felicia wouldn’t let him.
- Felicia wanted Jelly to be consistent and really be there for Bailee
Now, they have a co-parenting agreement.
Felicia’s drug addiction started with pain pills after she had Bailee
- She started off with Lortabs
- She then moved up to 40 mg Opana, which she took several times a day; this then escalated to heroine when she was around 24 years old
  - No one knew she was using heroine, everyone assumed it was pills
  - Her first time using, she threw up
  - She went from snorting it to shooting it up
  - When she shot up, she would get really tired and fall asleep; when she would snort it she had more energy and it helped with pain relief
- Between 2016 and 2017, Bunnie and Jelly got custody of Bailee
  - It got very bad at the end of her addiction and Bailee needed to get away from the situation
  - After Bailee was gone, Felicia went into a downward spiral
  - Felicia started smoking crack and shooting up methamphetamines
    - She was desperately trying to fill the void that was in her heart from Bailee’s absence
  - In the beginning Felicia was pissed, but she realized over time that Bunnie and Jelly were doing what was best for Bailee when she couldn’t; now her and Bunnie have a great relationship and are like sisters
- Felicia’s recovery:
  - She went away for 16 months and had no contact with Bailee
  - Bailee and Jelly wrote the song “Sunshine after the Rain”
  - When she got out, she was allowed visitation gradually and then eventually allowed to stay at the house
  - At first, Felicia was overwhelmed with falling back into the routine of being a mom and relearning how to have structure in her life
  - She relapsed on methamphetamines, and landed back in jail after 6 weeks
    - Bunnie and Jelly called her sponsor to get her help before she self-destructed
    - When she went back to jail, she got signed up for recovery court
    - Now she has a sponsor, a job, she bought her own car, she is house manager at her recovery house, and life is slowly falling back into place
  - Bunnie and Jelly made Felicia take them back to court to be able to be a part of Bailee’s life again
    - They wanted to make sure she was serious this time for Bailee’s sake
    - When Felicia is around, Bailee is so much more at peace
  - Felicia’s advice for recovery: It does get better; talk to people, open up; you have to have a support system to get better
    - Anyone can get into a sober house
    - You don’t have to be on probation or be court ordered
    - There is a crisis line called the Tennessee REDLINE that you can call. It is a 24/7 toll-free information and referral line to get substance abusers information to get in touch with counselors or medical professionals who can help them battle their addiction.
    - The Tennessee REDLINE phone number: 1-800-889-9789
    - There are so many rehabs, sober living/ transitional living places you can reach out to. Some are grants and state paid and will take anybody.
  - Bunnie, Jelly, and Bailee are so proud of the progress Felicia has made and the effort she has put forth to be back in Bailee’s life
- The process of recovery for Felicia has taught all of them a lot about forgiveness and second chances
- Bunnie and Bailee share a similar story. Bunnie’s mom is an addict and she was raised by her dad; her mom never came back into her life in the way that Felicia fought to be back with Bailee.
- Bailee was scared when she first saw her mom again and didn’t know how to react at first
  - She wrote her mom a letter to help express her emotions through her mom’s battle with addiction
- Bailee and Felicia are so happy to be back in each other’s lives

Quotes:

“Oh, I love a good Lor-d’oeuvre” – Bunnie

“I’m so glad to be back”- Felicia

“At this point it’s just showing up and showing out”- Felicia

Mentioned: