Jun 17, 2020
Bunnie and Manager Meme share embarrassing sex stories from their own lives as well as hilarious stories from fans for a much-needed laugh amidst the craziness of 2020.
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Takeaways:
- Olivia walked in on Meme and her mans, they told her they were folding laundry
- Bunnie unintentionally circumcised someone during sex and he had to go the hospital
- Sex stories from fans:
- A fan had a guy eat her out during sex and she thought her period was over until they guy pulled away and she saw a big blood clot in his beard. She never said anything to him, and they never spoke about it
- A fan and her ex-boyfriend, nick-named Ginger-Dick, were driving up to the hills to have sex near a boulder. When the deed was done, they talked about how it was fun while it lasted even though it was quick. From about 8 feet away, someone laughed and said, “yeah, while it lasted”. Apparently, a couple on the other side of the boulder witnessed the one-minute magic.
- About five years ago, a fan and her boyfriend and now baby daddy tried out anal sex. When he was about to finish, she turned around and opened her mouth, and realized there were chunks going into her mouth. She ran to the bathroom and immediately starting puking. Luckily her boyfriend thought it was hilarious, and now they have a running joke about chili dogs.
- A drunken night with a friend from school led one fan to accidentally shit while they were getting it on. When she came back to the room, he said “You made a mess, punk.” And she replied, “well you fucked the shit out of me”.
- “I smashed my ex with a strap-on and when I pulled out, he sprayed shit on me”.
- “I queefed so loud he asked me if I could hear the neighbors farting”. You can’t help it when you queef, but it is hilarious.
- “I sucked some dude’s dick and the way it tasted just made me sick. I had to call quits for real.”
- “My man is the biggest I’ve had, and I’ve been throwing up during oral. It goes down way too far.” According to manager Meme, grab your thumb and it might help keep the gag reflex at bay. They also have throat spray you can use, or just get drunk!
- A fan was having drunk sex with a girl and she poured a shot of vodka on his dick and it started to burn. When he stood up quickly, she accidentally knocked a shot of tequila into his eye. Bunnie’s pro tip: don’t juggle drinks while getting the nookie on- put the drinks down! When you’re drunk you get nasty: Bunnie started a fetish for herself when she drunkenly poured a bottle of baby oil on herself once, now she loves oiled up porn.
- “I screamed another dude’s name out while getting the shit fucked out of me.” If you aren’t good at names, just call everyone baby so you don’t get mixed up.
- A fan was feeling gassy after eating Mexican food. After waiting a few months to have sex, they finally went for it, but she was bloated and when he flipped her over and put her legs above her head, she farted for 15 solid seconds. She put her face in her hands and he started dying laughing and comforted her saying “shit happens”.
- After having a crush on a skater boy she went to middle school with, one fan finally hooked up with her crush. She didn’t realize she had started her period and they made a mess. She didn’t see him until years later at a WICCA appointment. He was there with his baby mama he kept looking at her like “I know who you are…” but never said anything.
- A fan and an old fuck buddy parked on the side of the road at a dead end to get it on. They saw headlights approaching but thought nothing of it and kept on getting it on. Two minutes later, a spotlight was shining in the car and up walked 3 cops, and she was butt ass naked, sitting on his dick, and the car smelled like straight sex. They made them get out of the car and she was standing on the side of the road with nothing, but his daughter’s Frozen blanket wrapped around her. The officers gave them a verbal warning and let them go.
- After her first time trying anal, this fan found discovered how hard it is to get the cum out of her ass. “Felt like I was pissing warm yogurt out of my ass and sounded like I was blowing up the bathroom.”
- After things got hot and heavy with this fan and a guy she was about to hook up with, she reached for his dick and it was only about as big as her thumb. She immediately texted her best friend to have her call her crying and ask to be picked up so she could find a way to politely bail her out of the awkward situation. When her friend called, she politely declined the guy’s generous offer to drive her and waited for him to leave. When he left she felt bad, but at least she spared his feelings!
- “I was making out with this guy once and all of the sudden my legs get wet. Well, come to find out, he came on me.” Bunnie said at first, she would have felt like “that bitch” but then she would have been pissed. Let’s be real, most guys can’t get it up again for a while after they finish.
- “I took too many Percocet’s before a BBW was riding me cowgirl, she damn near broke my dick.”
- “I fucked in my car in a Walmart parking lot for my third time.” Get in where you fit in baby!
- “I took acid and the girl I was banging had large tits. I thought they were tentacles and I freaked out.”
- A fan wrote in that once when she didn’t have any toys, so she used a jar of pickles. She popped a condom on a pickle and went to town. The condom burst and she had to squeeze the pickle out.
- “I was doing the stripper heel click with my legs in the air and farted…he’s now my husband.” These guys don’t care, they’ll take it how they can get it!
- The nastier you are, the more you’re gonna get wifed up!
Quotes:
“Why is there so much blood involved with sex?!”- Meme
“Gingers have no souls: we love gingers” – Bunnie
“That’s an ATM baby, Ass To Mouth!” – Bunnie
“That will open up the ole gaper”- Bunnie
“You fart cum bubbles for like a week afterwards”- Bunnie
“Where was the nose?!” – Bunnie
“Bitches love cucumbers in the puss” - Bunnie
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